Today is the third day that Mini has been back at school – my big boy is now in Year 1, and it seems a bit funny to think that just a year ago both he and I were looking as lost and frightened as some of the new Reception children and their mums do in the playground!
So far, it’s going OK. As regular readers will know, Mini’s anxieties are often expressed through his bladder control, or rather lack of it. But, he hasn’t wet the bed, he hasn’t wet himself at school, and he hasn’t been wet when we’ve got home after school either. It's been great. And Mini's been so proud of himself.
Whilst I’m extremely grateful that Mini is not finding this transition from Reception to Year 1 as traumatic as I’d expected, I am under no illusions about how long this might be for. I am trying so hard to remain positive, and I don’t want him to pick up any negative thoughts and vibes from me, but I know that we might just be in a honeymoon period.
Of course, looking on the slightly brighter side, it could be permanent and all the anxieties and problems we’ve had since January really could be all down to his lack of regular teacher in Reception, and the continual abandonment he felt each day she wasn’t there. (Obviously this was made extra difficult for Mini because of all the rejection he’s faced in the past).
For now, I’m just enjoying this new, dry, relaxed Mini. And he’s enjoyed the little surprise treats he’s received too.
He’s been talking more too. After the request for a therapist, it was a few days before any head space was mentioned again, but I asked Mini yesterday what he’d been doing at school. I got the usual response ‘I can’t remember’. So I suggested, jokingly, that we put an imaginary board in his head and he could use imaginary blue tack to stick imaginary reminders on it, then he’d never forget what he’s done at school. He seemed to like this idea, but then got very confused about how we would get the reminders out, because we can’t get inside his head… but he did agree to try to remember more so he could tell me.
The CAMHS therapist always said that these difficult times would come and go, and she explained Mini’s life (or childhood at least) was likely to be full of peaks and troughs as knowledge and understanding caught up with one another and then parted again. Perhaps we’ve been through a trough, maybe we’re on our way to a peak right now?